The Five-Minute Pity Party

This morning while writing my blog, I got up to refill my coffee cup and heard a little crunch under my feet as I sat back down.  Where did that sound come from?  Well, you 5 minute pity partyguessed it… I stepped on my glasses!  As I bent down to pick up the pieces I thought, “This really isn’t in my budget right now.  Last month I needed new tires and brakes on my car.”

And then it happened…. the moment when you decide whether to have a “5-Minute Pity Party” or let something ruin your whole day (or possibly your whole week!)  Let me explain about this “party”.

Years ago, my oldest daughter was in middle school.  One day she got off the bus, came into my office, and proceeded to tell me how unfair Mrs. So-and-So was and the project she assigned made no sense and on and on. As I sat there listening and watching my daughter complain, I realized there would be many things in her life that would not go the way she planned or would seem unfair. How could I help prepare her?

I looked at my daughter and said, “Ok, you have 5 minutes to tell me how unfair this is.”  Then I looked at my watch and said, “Go!” She started out strong, listing details and sharing her views.  After a couple minutes she stopped and I said, “Keep going, you still have 3 more minutes of complaining!”  This made her laugh and changed the whole mood!

After this time of releasing and complaining, we were able to discuss her options. We role-played how she could talk to her teacher in a respectful way.  I wanted my two daughters to understand that things would happen in their lives that they didn’t necessarily like or want to happen. But, they had a choice to make- would they choose pity or productive thoughts and actions.

As she walked off, I realized I often needed to have my own pity party.  Instead of calling 3 friends or telling the checkout clerk, I needed to learn to work through my challenges and disappointments. Thus began the “Five-Minute Pity Party” at our house.

Let me be clear, there are definitely times in life to mourn and grieve; I don’t want you to just put on the happy face and go on.  There are certainly trials and events that need to be processed for a much longer period of time than five minutes. I’m referring to those little things that come up daily and are often more annoying than difficult. Now when these happen, I stop and spend a few minutes writing or telling God how unfair this is! I get it out….which leaves room for options and/or solutions.  And sometimes the solution is to do nothing- I’m ok with that too, after I have my “5-Minute Pity Party”.

So, the next time you do something like step on your glasses, are frustrated with someone or something, or dealt a hand that seems unfair, I invite you to the “Five-Minute Pity Party”! And by the way, it’s amazing what a little duct tape can do for broken glasses!

How do you handle daily challenges and things that seem unfair? Let us know in the comment section below.

Lori Burrell

Lori loves encouraging and talking to women of all ages! Her favorite word is “joy” and she loves to help others seek and find it in their own lives. After going through a difficult season, Lori desires that others find hope and peace in trials and hardships. She is grateful that God is allowing her to pursue her passion of coaching women to live a life of no regret!
About Lori Burrell

Lori loves encouraging and talking to women of all ages! Her favorite word is “joy” and she loves to help others seek and find it in their own lives. After going through a difficult season, Lori desires that others find hope and peace in trials and hardships. She is grateful that God is allowing her to pursue her passion of coaching women to live a life of no regret!

Comments

  1. If God did not intend for us to have feelings, we would not have them. It’s important to feel them yet you can’t let them take over. When I was working through depression years ago acknowledging feelings was so key in my recovery process. Feel it and move along but never ignore them or they just mound up and erupt at the most inconvenient time. 🙂 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. Ecc. 3:1

  2. Ah, yes, feelings. The only way I find effective to manage them is to have my 5 minute pity party and then check those thoughts against the Word and remember just because I thought it or said gives that thought or word no credibility, true or not. God’s Word trumps anything I or man can create. Good post!

Share Your Heart

*